Boy sat on concrete wall with black backpack
Appearance Relationships

What is ‘Attractive’?

We’ve all had days when it seems impossible to feel attractive, and days when we feel like the best thing since sliced bread. Research by Lynx found that guys feel and are most attractive when they are comfortable being themselves, and we wanted to find out if you guys feel the same.

On Valentine’s Day, we asked you in an Instagram story how attractive you felt and what you found attractive in others, and we found out that most of you are not feeling too great about yourselves right now. This is something that we want to change and get you guys feeling your very best this time of year, so that you are walking tall like Dwayne Johnson for February and beyond!

We also found that a lot of what you find attractive about yourselves and what you look for in other people doesn’t quite match up. We are here to play attraction detectives and show you that individuality and being comfortable in yourself is what makes you guys most attractive.

Most of you rated yourselves below 50% on a scale of how ‘attractive’ you felt 

It seems we are all in need of a self-love makeover. Confidence is a key element to attraction, and a lot of it comes from being comfortable with who you are. In fact, according to research by Lynx, 9/10 girls find guys most attractive when they’re being themselves. Can’t fight those odds! 

Building self-esteem can be a tricky job, especially when you are feeling low, but there are loads of things you can do. If you need a bit of inspiration on where to start, read our article on building self-esteem here

But nearly all of you found something you loved about yourself 

Yay! See – not everything is that bad! Keep picking out things you love about yourself and tell yourself every time you wake up and every time you go to bed. Soon you will have the kind of confidence that even Kanye would be jealous of. 

This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is giphy.gif

Most responses about what you liked about yourselves were related to physical appearance 

Most of what you guys felt was attractive about yourself was to do with how you look. Of course, it’s great to feel like you have hair on fleek or a strong trainer game when you step out the door but there is so much more to you than simply how you look. Being ‘yourself’ and feeling attractive are pretty much tied together, so we gotta make sure that we are loving every little bit of what makes us ‘us’, from what we love to do, to what we love to wear and beyond. 

But nearly all of you stated that you looked for personality traits and uniqueness in a guy/girl

Even though so many of you felt how you looked was the best thing about you, nearly all of you thought that what made someone uniquely ‘them’ was what really did it for you. Quirky personalities, unique hobbies, a different sense of humour or simple kindness dominated the responses for what you looked for in a guy or a girl. 

So, basically, there is no one version of ‘attractive’ 

So, it seems what we all think is attractive about ourselves begins and ends with the bathroom mirror, but all of us are looking for something more than that in someone else. Kinda seems we need to start thinking that we are all one big beautiful meal deal full of wonderful things, and getting confidence from how we look AND who we are is a sure-fire way to get others looking at us like how we all look at the last slice of pizza in the box.

Eyes, hair, legs, bum, name, humour, music taste, dress sense, kindness, even ability to do long division without breaking a sweat. We had hundreds of submissions that told us one thing above all else; there are no set rules in attraction or what makes us attractive to someone else.

If you feel like you need to talk to someone about relationships, love, or anything that is bothering you, reach out to our support community here.

Want to see more? Follow us on Instagram @ditchthelabel for more as well as our friends over at Lynx @lynx.


  • I Feel An Odd Sort Of Guilt
    Well hello. It's been years at this point but you guys helped me once and I figured its worth a shot again. Also I really hope this is in the right forum, wasn't sure if I should put it here or in mental health. I've been in a relationship with my current boyfriend for almost […]
  • Did I come out wrong?
    so i just came out as bi to my mom. i (24f) am engaged to a 23 year old male, who i already came out to. my family has always been very accepting of anything and my moms best friend is an open lesbian. my brother, sister-in-law, and fiance wer all at my moms today […]
  • hey i am new
    hey im kinda new here i dont really know what to say, just tht im gg thru my depression rn and im just ver sensitive and demotivated to do anything at all
  • Hello I am new!
    Hey everyone, my username is Doofy. I am quite bad at introductions to be honest, there is not much to tell about myself. Well I am queestioning my everything at the moment, I was very sure of everything for a while but we are back at the start again... Anyways, in my bio? yes my […]
  • I Finally Cut My Catfish Loose, and I Miss Him So Much :'(
    I met the man of my dreams last December (2020). Everything I have ever wanted. We fell in love so fast and so deep. We dated for 10 months, texting every day for hours and hours. I always knew he lied about things, but I believed that the lies were because he was scared of […]
  • Chronic Bullying on a Mobile Game
    I have been playing Game of Sultans, a mobile game, for roughly 3 years. Unfortunately, for the past 10 months, I have been targeted by a group of individuals. They chain me repeatedly, 40 times or more in a setting, destroy other game play, and resort to name calling in the local chat. I have […]